According to Psychology Today, this is
the definition of a micro aggression:
everyday verbal, nonverbal, and environmental slights, snubs, or insults, whether intentional or unintentional, which communicate hostile, derogatory, or negative messages to target persons based solely upon their marginalized group membership.
As a woman, redheaded and bisexual at
that, I have certainly experienced microaggressions. But one of the
small and common put downs that hurts me the most has nothing to do
with being female or queer, and therefore probably doesn't qualify
for the definition, although it still fits the frame.
Yep, poor, privileged me: I'm tired of
being put down for being an artist.
Artist friends and I talk about the
discomfort of self identifying as an artist. Maybe the push back from
the world that we feel is because of lack of financial success. I
have heard many variations on the theme of “What a luxury that you
get to spend all your time on this fun hobby! Aren't you so lucky? I
wish I could indulge in my
creative side the way you do!” Or, “Yeah, being an artist
isn't much to brag about.” Or, “Calling yourself an artist just
sounds so pompous to me.” (All of the above were said to me by
non-artists.)
So, even writing that, my breathing has
gone shallow, my stomach hurts, my heart is pounding, my upper lip is
sweating, and I'm starting to see spots. Seriously.
But I feel compelled to examine this
closely. This sometimes implied and sometimes explicit line has been
delivered to me all my life, starting with my father telling me, in
high school, that no, being an artist was not a good career, but
something to do on the side. Farming, on the other hand …
This question severely affects my self
worth. Now my kidneys hurt – adrenal glands – and it's getting
just a wee bit ridiculous.
Time for a walk and some meditation. Check
back in.